Your Breakfast is Lame.

The Most Important Meal of the Day

I used to be a breakfast skipper - it's true. Are you a skipper too? I didn't mean to write a poem. Click here to see why you shouldn't skip breakfast either....oem.

Though to be fair, breakfast is by far the easiest meal to skip, should one be skipped at all.

For starters, if you work mornings, you may be crunched for time. Choosing between wearing pants and eating breakfast is pretty much a no-brainer, so those of us night owls who struggle not to hit snooze in the morning are often scrambling (but not our eggs) before we skip out the door.

Secondly, most people find they are not hungry when they first wake up. I never wanted breakfast, so why eat when I'm not hungry, right? Isn't that what common sense dictates? Especially if you're dieting, you would assume that if you find a single moment when you miraculously are not craving food you should take advantage of it.

Thirdly, it's hard to find a healthy, quick and easy "standard" breakfast food. Donuts, bagels, muffins, danishes, pancakes, waffles and toaster pastries are pretty much under the "breakfast" category, when I think most people would agree they'd be better suited under the "sometimes" category. They're sugar and carb-laden with minimal to no protein - why do you want to start your day like that?

As for protein-filled "normal" breakfasts, although eggs are great, bacon and sausage are certainly not the healthiest of meat products. Both are quite fatty and salty, and unless you're buying high quality sausage it's probably more closely equated to a hot dog than meat. Again, why do you want to start your day like that?

Not to mention, can you think of any vegetables associated with breakfast? Sure you can throw some in an omelet, but is there ever a side of veggies with a breakfast entree? In England they do a broiled tomato, but otherwise I got zilch (and no, potatoes fried in oil don't count). Fruit is great, but it's also got a lot of sugar, and if you're pairing that with your bagel then you're going to have one heck of a blood sugar spike. Blood sugar spikes lead to cravings, and cravings lead to bad choices.

And finally, breakfast foods are more particular than food for other meals. Not many people make elaborate breakfasts unless it's maybe a weekend or a special occasion, yet most seem to have no problem spending a good chunk of energy planning dinners on a nightly basis. Lunches are generally more casual and done on the fly, but you can eat anything for lunch and not look like a freak - sandwich, meatloaf, salad, soup, fried chicken, etc etc - and yet if you had one of those things for breakfast, people would think you're odd.

My revolution:
Stop Being a Breakfast Prude!

Does eating a salad at 6am make it any less nutritious than at 6pm? I think not!
Do our leftovers need to wait an extra four hours to sit and grow bacteria before reheating? I think not!
Do we have to settle for sugary carbs and fatty, salty meats for our only options? I think not!

The Path to Breakfast Redeption:

1. Add some vegetables. Could be a salad, leftovers, cold carrot sticks... whatever floats your boat. A meal at lunch or dinner doesn't look quite right without veggies, so breakfast shouldn't either.
2. Easy on the carbs. I'm not saying go no-carb or even low-carb, just go sensible-carb. A serving of oatmeal, a banana and a glass of orange juice is roughly 68 grams of carbs... And that's without adding sugar or milk to the oatmeal. And keep in mind, a meal should only contain about 45-60 grams of carbs, according to the American Diabetes Association. And you haven't even had any protein yet! Those calories are adding up.
3. Add protein. You don't have to eat like a body builder and eat a 12oz steak for breakfast, but you should be at least attempting to round out your meal. Any meal that is so drastically lopsided, whether that be fat, carbs or protein, should be rethought.
4. Don't be embarrassed. Taking your leftover salmon filet and broccoli for breakfast? Be proud! You know you're eating more healthily than the coworker who snagged a drive-through breakfast sandwich.

All About Protein

I am Pro-Protein!

A conversation with my inner noob (am I crazy?)

Protein comes from: meat! dairy! legumes! eggs! nuts!

What it does: it helps build/repair your body (including those sexy muscles of yours!). It also a form of energy, because (duh) those foods have calories.

Can you elaborate on how it helps my muscles? Sure: When you work out (which requires muscles to move no matter what you're doing... obviously) your muscles are twitching (there's fast twitch and slow twich muscle fibers, the latter refering to those which sustain you on a long jog, vs the fast which give you amazing power in little bursts, such as when you are sprinting... but I digress) and stressing and having a huge dance party. And they get tired. They get little mini tears in them because of the stress of motion and contractions, chemicals reacting, etc etc. So, in order to repair (not to mention grow, cause you can't grow without fuel!) you need a) calories and b) specifically protein. It's like if you skip feeding your plant or giving it fresh soil - it will grow, but not the way you want it to!

So why do I care about muscles if all I want is to lose fat? Well: if your muscles are not supplied with proper proteins, the repair process and therefore your muscular development is like buying Walmart underwear vs Victoria's Secret - it does the job, but does it look and feel the best? Is it sexy? Sure, the Walmart pair is fine when it's under your clothing, but the Victoria's secret is the one you wanna wear when that special someone comes around.

Having muscles and a low bodyfat percentage (mind you "low" is relative here - women bodybuilders can get down to a minimum of about 9%, where "normal" ladies probably want to opt for 15-20% to see nice definition) IS SEXY. We don't need 20" biceps, but I bet you'd rather have a sleek line on the inside of your arm than a saggy garbage bag dangling below it.... okay, so those are obviously esthetic things. But there are legitimate FAT BURNING reasons too!

I like burning fat! Can you elaborate on the fat burning stuff? Let's start with basic principles here. You probably already know that if you have a LARGE body, you are going to need a LARGE amount of calories to sustain it. We're not even talking body composition here - this is just the fact that plain old LARGE people need to eat a lot (relatively) to remain large. You get a 300lb man, he will probably have a BMR (basal metabolic rate - the amount of calories your body needs to just exist if you were, for instance, in a coma) of at least 2000. And that's not including daily activities (even if that's just getting up to go to the bathroom and the fridge) which would give him a TDEE (total daily energy expenditure - basically your maintenance calories if you wanted to keep your lifestyle the same and stay the exact same weight) of about 2400. That means this large man needs to eat at least 2400 calories a day to avoid losing weight.

Now let's look a little deeper, at your body composition: fat is not very metabolically active. This means that fat can just sit there without you feeding it and it will stay the same. Unless your body is tapping into it for energy purposes, it's very existance does not require feedings. It is like a fake houseplant. However, muscle IS metabolically active. this means that muscle CAN'T just sit there without you feeding it, it requires regular feedings in order to thrive. It is like a REAL houseplant. Its very existance BURNS CALORIES.

Holy crap, so this means if I don't do cardio at all but I strength train 5x a week, I can still lose weight? Assuming you're eating enough and including enough protein... yes and no. Yes you will lose FAT, but you may not necessaily lose weight.

What?

Muscle is more dense than fat. if you are gaining muscles through your strength training it will melt away your fat, and your clothes will be looser and you will feel sexier, but the number on the scale may not go down.

Okay, I'll just do cardio then, because I want to lose 10lbs. You're dumb. would you rather look like a supermodel and weigh 150lbs or look like wax dripping off a candlestick and weigh 110lbs? I'm hoping you chose heavy supermodel vs the light flabbymonster, or else I wrote all this for no reason.

I choose the heavy supermodel. So what's the point of cardio? Cardio is still important. Firstly, it improves your cardiovascular health. It improves your endurance, so you can outrun the zombies when the world ends. It also is fantastic at burning calories. The key with cardio is to do it right! As with most things in life, you probably want to do something the right way first instead of wasting time.

So how do I do it right? You have to fuel yourself properly.

• Eat enough protein so that your muscles replair.
• Eat enough (period) so there are enough calories in your system to
• Fuel your workout performance, and
• Make sure that your body doesn't turn to eating your muscles for fuel. if your LBM (lean body mass, which is all your organs/bones/muscles - a number you do NOT WANT TO GO DOWN, EVER) decreses, that means your muscles are being eaten away from a combination of not being well-repaired and probably too big of a calorie deficit.

Yes, I know you can lose like 20lbs in a month if you starve yourself and do massive amounts of cardio. Biggest Loser proves that. But is it healthy? No. Is it sustainable loss? Not likely. Do it slow and steady so you can stay that way! Anyhoo..

How do I know if I'm really doing this right? If you're doing the whole weight loss thing right, your LBM should stay the same or increase, while your bodyfat percentage decreases. To find out your LBM you need to know your weight and your bodyfat percentage. Unfortunately I've only had mine measured professionally once, about four years ago when I joined a gym, and I can't remember the number and it's probably changed since then anyway. Fortunately, there are INTERNET ways to do this! It's not as accurate, but if you're using the same method to measure it every time, it is the PROGRESS that counts! Here's a site where you can figure it out at home. (remember it is definitely not nearly as accurate as a caliper test, but it's something to mark progress at the least).

Now that you have this percentage, you can figure out how many POUNDS of fat are on your body by:

• Taking your body weight and multiplying it by the percentage.
• So for me, I'm apparently 25% body fat, so I would do 145 x .25 = 36.25. That means I have 36.25lbs of pure fat on my body (some of this is essential fat: some so I am not a skeleton, some to surround and protect my organs, and of course boobies!).
• Now you can see your LBM by subtracting the pounds of fat from your total body weight.
• For me, 145 - 36.25 = 108.75. That means my bones, muscles and organs together weigh about 109lbs. (you can also figure out a goal weight for yourself by playing with these numbers, but again this internet calculator is NOT as accurate as a caliper test, so take it with a grain of salt).

If I take my measurements in a month and my weight has gone down but my LBM has ALSO gone down, that means I really need to reevaluate how I am losing my weight. You do NOT want to lose muscle, because this will slow your metabolism, stall your fat loss, and even if you do get down to your goal weight you will probably still not be happy with the way you look, because you will be "skinnyfat." your goal should be FAT LOSS, not weight loss.

Weight is arbitrary. Bodyfat percentage is what counts.

All About Carbs

You'd think eating carbs is death sentence for dieters, but it's not all bad! After all, vegetables and fruits have little to no protein and fat, and can be (simplistically) considered to be all-carb. Would anyone in their right mind tell you to not eat your greens? Lettuce hope not.

Bottom line, you know what's good for you and what's not. Don't disregard some item just because it's high in carbs - think about where it comes from. Is it sugar, or carrots? Flour, or apples? I don't think anyone believes something refined and processed can possibly be better for them than a vegetable, right? Oh wait, the food pyramid.
A recommended 6-11 servings of grains a day means there are generations who grew up thinking eating a loaf a bread in a day would technically be okay. That's about 1100 calories of just bread, if you were to eat 11 slices. And who eats plain bread? We're going to slather those babies in bologna, mayo and American cheese! No wonder this country is obese.
 
Thank goodness we now have My Plate, which is much more simple, not to mention moderate. High five, US Department of Agriculture. This is better. And thanks for including a fork, I wasn't sure if those were healthy!

Carbohydratalicious!

The more carbs you have floating around in your system, the less your body uses fat for energy.

carbs = energy
body fat = (stored) energy (from excess carbs/calories/etc throughout your life)

So:
working out = using energy
lots of carbs floating around in your system = easy energy
lots of energy in your fatty tissues = difficult energy
human body = lazy
lazy = use the easiest resources up first

So:
working out when you have a bunch of carbs in your system = using up all the carbs (called glycogen) before even touching body fat,
vs.
working out when you have not eaten a lot of carbs = body has to reach for the adipose tissue (fat/stored energy)

So:

Although you will feel better/more energetic when you have eaten a bowl of pasta right before zumba class (40-60 grams of carbs), your calories burned will be coming from your lunch and not your bum. In theory. This is why long distance runners eat like 23893 grams of carbs (not to mention calories) a day, and drink those sugar goo things while they're on their run; they don't need to burn fat, they need to stay energized. Therefore, if you're looking to improve your performance/endurance, eat lots of carbs. You'll be like the energizer bunny.

If you, on the other hand, go for a run after eating a can of tuna (zero carbs) your body has to dig into those fat stores to keep you going. You may feel a bit more wiped out from it than if you'd eaten your pasta, but you will also be more productive in terms of fat loss. In addition, you will technically be burning the same amount of calories as if you'd eaten the pasta (assuming you're performing at the same level even with the lack of energy), but the calories burned are fat calories and not carb calories, and are therefore more valuable to you!

This is obviously simplistic - your body will still always burn fat calories even if you've carb-loaded, and there will always be carbs (glycogen) in your system, but I hope you get my point. You will feel wiped out and miserable if you try to keep your carbs too low; but too much is bad and counterproductive to fat loss, even if you are keeping your calories lowered.

But! Don't neglect something just because it's high carb, for Pete's sake! You should be snubbing the cakes and bagels, not the mashed potatoes and applesauce! Processed foods are less natural, have more additives, and are farther from their original state in the universe. You want to eat things as close to nature as possible. Not that I don't eat those things, because I eat them aplenty (I just ate a Dove chocolate bar). I'm just saying to use your head. You know what's healthier: donut vs toast, dinner roll vs baked potato, applesauce vs apple, ice cream vs milk. Check out the glycemic index for more on these simple vs complex carbs - I think you'll soon find a correlation.

Eat a greater percentage of healthy carbs like fruits and veggies instead of flour and sugar products, and you'll be lowering the calorie intake without even trying. It's pretty much impossible to eat 1000 calories of lettuce in one sitting (that's about 200 cups!), but it sure is easy to eat that many donuts (could be less than two, if you're eating Dunkin's chocolate cake donut)

Veggie "Pasta" with Meat Sauce

If you get grumpy tummies from pasta too, try this healthy, easy-on-the-belly alternative! No, it won't make you believe you're eating real pasta. But, it's a genuine alternative that does not include creepy chemicals. It's not like when a vegetarian still wants to eat chicken but instead buys "chicken." You're likely not doing your body or the environment a favor by consuming something so heavily processed... but I digress! If you want to try this yummy, all natural (and I mean that honestly, unlike food labels), huge, filling entree, please take a look at the recipe for

Veggie "Pasta" with Meat Sauce

352 calories, 32g carbs, 32g protein, 13g fat, 6g fiber, 1305mg sodium

Now before you're scared off by the sodium level, please note that I used jarred/pre-made pasta sauce, because I love shortcuts. If you are concerned, make sauce from scratch! It's really easy, I promise... though there's no recipe here so you'll have to go googlin.

2 cups of "noodled" veggies = 32 calories

vs 2 cups of spaghetti (cooked) = 394 calories

4oz of 94% lean ground turkey = 160 calories

vs 4oz 95% lean ground beef = 200 calories

I rest my case.

Here's what I used:

• 1/2 a medium Zucchini
• 1/2 a medium Yellow squash
• 1 cup jarred Pasta Sauce of choice
• 4oz 94% Lean Ground Turkey
• 1 Tbsp grated Parmesan

First you want to start browning the ground turkey in a pan over medium-high heat.

While that is cooking (keep an eye on it!) take a vegetable peeler and peel your zucchini and yellow squash lengthwise til there's basically nothing left except the funky, seedy core (I opted not to use that bit). Turn the squashes so you're essentially whittling away from all sides evenly; this keeps your "noodles" from being super wide. They should vaguely look like fettuccine - long like spaghetti but wider and flatter.

When your meat is cooked (you don't want any pink with poultry, ya know!) you want to pour your pasta sauce in the pan with it just so it can get heated through. After about a minute I shut off the heat to the burner but left the pan on top of it to retain the heat a bit longer.

Next, pop your plate or bowlful of "noodles" into the microwave for 1 minute. Since they're such watery vegetables it doesn't take long at all to break down the fibers to a softer, edible, pasta-y state. If you're an elitist and don't like microwaves you could also dunk them briefly into boiling water, or stick them in with the sauce and wait til they heat up that way. But me, I use the microwave, because I ain't scared, it's easier, (contrary to popular belief) it preserves nutrients, and makes fewer dishes for me. No matter which method you use, be brief with the cooking process. If you overcook it, the whole dish becomes a big sloppy blob. We're going for al dente, just like mama makes... if I had an Italian mama.

Now, combine! Pour that sauce all over your "pasta," sprinkle with grated Parmesan and enjoy!

Oh Food, What Ya Do to Me

Not feelin' so hot today. I had a sodium-overload last night and a lot of caffeine this morning, so I've got myself a migraine! Joy. If I take my pills ASAP it's definitely managable, but still not fun. Especially not at work.

If there's one thing I've learned from keeping a food diary, it's how food affects my body. I don't mean calorically speaking, although certainly that was the point of starting the whole thing, but rather how certain foods (and their quantities) make me feel.

If you are a migraine-sufferer, allergy-sufferer, asthma-sufferer, zit-sufferer, gas-sufferer, general-intestinal-issues-sufferer, take heed - what you eat is directly linked to how your body makes you feel. Sure, the weather, your big mean coworkers and your sleep patterns matter too, but the biggest control that I have over all of the aforemention afflictions is what I stick in my mouth.

If I find myself eating junk as a snack or as one meal, it's totally fine. It appears that my body agrees with the philosophy of "everything in moderation." If, however, I am consistently eating junk, particularly for a couple days at a time, bad things happen!

Migraines: Although there are a large variety of foods that are generally cautioned as triggers, I haven't personally found most of these as related to my own migraines. My migraines usually occur as a "hangover" the day after I've consumed either too much sodium or red wine (other alcohol doesn't seem to affect me here). Or, they'll happen about 1-2 hours after I've consumed caffeine on an empty stomach. If I eat something along with it, there usually is not a problem. Or... sometimes they just happen. C'est la vie.

Allergies: I have itchy eyes and sniffles/sneezing pretty much every day at least to some extent (woe is me), but if I'm sticking to "real" food they seem to be better. If I eat a lot of chips, processed junk like candy or frozen meals for a few days in a row, I seem to get even worse. It's bizarre, and logically I do not understand it, but I've watched the patterns. Eating things that don't come with an ingredient list just seem to agree with me.

Asthma: I've got both exercise-induced, cold weather-induced and allergy-induced asthma, so like the allergies I am affected by it daily no matter what I do. I also, however, seem to get asthma after a big meal. If I get Thanksgiving-full, it's triggered. I've yet to determine if what I eat affects this too... generally if I'm stuffing my face like that it's some sort of special occasion where there's bound to be treats, but I couldn't say for sure right now.

Breakouts: Pretty much the same as the allergies. A couple days worth of cookies and cake and potato chips will send my skin into Uglyville. I only get 1 or 2 little bitty issues a month if I'm good... and 5-6 in a day if I'm not. Big incentive.

Gas/bloating: The worst offender here is beer. If I have a beer, I instantly feel 9 months pregnant. It's ridiculous. Fortunately I'm not especially into beer, so this is easily avoided. Next on the list is gluten; pasta, bread, crackers, etc all are fine if I have one serving, but one serving is generally one piece of bread or one cup of pasta. Not really that filling, quite honestly. Not for a ravenous monkey like me. Which is why it's easier to try and just avoid it completely. Not to mention, I notice that if I eat bread or pasta, I crave more. Like, crave more food, so at the end of a day started with toast I have consumed 1000 extra calories because of the way it makes me feel starving. I'm assuming this has something to do with blood sugar, but who knows.

Intestinal distress, I'll call it: I'm lactose intolerant, so it's pretty easy to find the offenders here. Fortunately certain cheeses that are aged longer (cheddar or parmesan, for example) are essentially lactose-free. Goat's milk and products also naturally have lower lactose levels, so they're easier to digest. I find it not quite as delicious as cow, but it's still good. It's just more pungent. But it's just not worth it to put myself in that uncomfortable state, so if I am going to indulge in regular ice cream or alfredo or something I have to take a couple of lactose enzyme pills. I feel like I still have issues, but it's lessened at least.

Moral of the story: if you've got unfortunate and unexplained maladies, watch what you eat. It makes a bigger difference than you think. But! Give it more than a day to see results. Give it at least a week, if not a month of clean eating (real foods! Veggies, fruit, meat, poultry, fish!) and note how you feel. It's surprising.

Awww Shucks

Truth.

Why I hate corn:

1. it gets stuck in my teeth
2. it doesn't taste that great
3. sometimes when you shuck fresh ears there are caterpillars
• I hate caterpillars

Why the rest of the world hates corn:

1. the food industry
2. it's not Paleo
3. it's corny

But despite all these reasons, my boyfriend loves it. When he cooked a few ears for our BBQ the other night, however, it went largely untouched. I felt a little vindictively happy. Ha! Our friends don't like it either! Corn lovin freak!

But since I have a phobia of wasting food, it must be consumed; I suppose it's a sunk cost anyway. So that's why I made a teensy batch of

Chunky Corn Salsa

90 calories, 21g carbs, 3g protein, 1g fat, 2g fiber, 159mg sodium

Makes a bit over 1 cup - double/triple/quadruple as needed, depending on how much leftover corn you have

• 1/2 ear of corn (cooked), sliced off the cob
• 1 plum tomato, diced
• 1/4 cup diced red onion
• 1 small jalapeno, diced
• 1 clove garlic, minced
• 1 tsp cilantro (1 Tbsp if fresh)
• juice of 1/2 a lime
• cumin, chili powder, salt & pepper to taste

Chop, mix & let sit for a few hours (or ideally overnight) for all the flavors to come together. Not that it won't be good off the bat, but it certainly improves with time! Serve with some tortilla chips (oh look, more corn). Currently crushin Xochitl brand.

Yes I know I just said I didn't like corn, but tortilla chips are a very large exception. I still dislike taco shells, grits, polenta, corn pudding, etc. Corn pudding might even make me wanna vomit. This corn salsa is acceptable to my maize-hatin ways because it's salsa, and it's fresh, and it uses my homegrown jalapenos, which just makes me all warm 'n fuzzy inside.

In an unmixed state: that green blob is cilantro, a la tube.

P.S. I also used to hate cilantro. It tasted like soap to me, yet now I am obsessed with it. I think it's one of those things about getting older, like suddenly not minding cleaning or flossing quite so much anymore...

Trash in My Face

This morning I was supposed to be at work at 7am... but I woke up at 7:07. My only consolation was that 7 is my favorite number - maybe it is going to be a good day anyway! Unlikely, at this point, because this is what I managed to pack for lunch in my 30-second grab-n-go panic:

   

I don't have an actual picture, because it looks like someone pooped on my mac & cheese. My friends, who hung out with my boyfriend all night while I slaved away at work until 11pm, apparently consumed (most) of this creation. The little bit that was left became my lunch, along with a side of frozen peas and carrots. I felt like I was in an elementary school cafeteria. I give it a C, its saving grace being its sodium. Delicious sodium.

I know people say that you are in 100% control of what you put in your mouth, and any "bad" things you eat are your own damn fault... but you know what? I could have either grabbed this or some celery, and a few stalks of celery are not going to hold me over on an 8 hour workday.

Along that same vein, someone might argue that if I had at least grabbed some celery to go with the meal it would be more nutritious. But really? It's just an additional 10 calories and a miniscule amount of nutrition. It's not like my body is starved of vitamins and I'm dying of cholera - the celery does not cancel out the badness of the main dish. I eat well most of the time. I don't "need" celery RIGHT NOW.

Lesson learned: if you have to eat garbledegook in order to not pass out from hypoglycemia while on shift, just do it. Whatever. Stay sane, eat healthy when you can. Do the best you can under the circumstances. And my circumstances were that I had negative 15 minutes to get to work and my friends eat like 7 year olds :)